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Georgie wiped it away with her finger.
‘I know it’s hard, Georgie. Don’t cry, babe. We’re going to get through this. All of us.’
‘How about I go and grab us all a cup of tea?’ Tania suggested, deciding to make herself scarce for a few minutes so that Josie and Georgie could talk.
‘That would be nice, thanks,’ Josie said appreciatively, before watching the woman walk across the visitor’s room to the tea bar.
She looked at Georgie then; her heart had been yearning for her beautiful daughter. Josie had been dreaming of this moment. Craving for the chance to see her girls.
Now Georgie was here, sitting just across the table from her, but the girl seemed cold. Distant. A few feet felt like a thousand miles.
‘She seems nice,’ Josie said, genuinely. Glad that Children’s Services had managed to get her children’s foster family right.
She’d spoken to Georgie and Marnie a couple of times on the phone before today, and they both seemed happy where they’d been placed. That was some comfort to her, at least.
‘She is nice, Mum.’ Georgie said. ‘Her and Carl. They have a daughter my age too. Hollie. They’re just a normal family. We never had that, did we? A normal family?’
‘No, love, I guess we didn’t.’ Josie shook her head, ashamed of herself for everything she’d put the girls through. She had so many regrets, so much remorse.
She spent the long days in here thinking about every moment, every incident. Torturing herself with guilt and shame.
She blamed herself for Trevor.
For letting him into their home, near her children. It had all been her fault. That was a heavy cross to bear.
‘How could you have not told us about Delray, Mum?’ Georgie said, still angry at her for so many things. Her head was spinning. There was so much to say, so much to ask, but Georgie didn’t even know where to begin with it all.
‘I just wanted to protect you both. He didn’t want to know, Georgie. He had no interest in Marnie. How could I tell a little girl that… that her father didn’t give a shit about her?’ Josie shook her head. ‘You were both mine. No one else’s. From the minute you were both born, you were only ever mine.’
Looking down at the table, she was truly sorry that the girls had found out the way that they had. She wished more than ever she had been there, been able to explain.
She still couldn’t believe that Delray was dead. That Javine Turner had killed him before doing a runner.
Josie had spoken to Mandy on the phone, and her friend had filled her in on everything that had happened. It was a shock, but after what Mandy had told her that Delray had done to Georgie, Josie hoped the man rotted in hell.
‘I know that it didn’t feel like I was always a good mum to you both, Georgie, God knows I’ve had my problems, but I should never have put you both through the things that I did. The job, the drugs, all of it. I’m more sorry than you’ll ever know.’
Georgie stayed quiet. She needed to hear this more than anything. She needed to try and understand.
‘I just want you and your sister to know that the two of you are my life. You are my reason for breathing. I failed you both, Georgie, and you have every right to hate me, but I want you to know that I will do anything now to make it better.’
‘Then tell them the truth,’ Georgie said, looking at her mum, her eyes pleading with her.
Josie shook her head.
‘That’s the one thing I can’t do, Georgie. You know I can’t.’
‘But Mum—’
‘No, Georgie. Just leave it. I failed you both once, and I will never do that to you again. This is the best way, believe me. You mustn’t say anything, Georgie.’
Georgie bit her lip. Not wanting to cry anymore.
‘Let me make this right. I need to make this right. I’m not letting you and your sister suffer any more. I owe you both this. Please Georgie, let me do this.’
Josie placed her hand on Georgie’s. ‘I ruined my life. I destroyed it, I know that. You two have everything ahead of you. I won’t have that tainted.’
Georgie nodded. She knew that there would be no persuading her mother. Her mind was made up.
Tania was coming back to the table now, laden with drinks and some chocolate bars.
‘Promise me, Georgie.’
Georgie looked up at her mother.
‘I promise.’
Chapter Fifty-One
‘Remember, if at any time you want to stop, Marnie, you just tell Sally and she’ll finish the session, okay?’ Rose Feltham said, bending down on one knee so she was at Marnie’s level.
‘I’m going to be sitting just here. Just outside the door. Okay?’
Marnie nodded.
The child was doing really well considering all she had been through. Sally had made a real breakthrough the past couple of sessions. The signs were all there that Marnie had suffered a considerable amount of sexual abuse, but as yet it was as if the child was too young to even comprehend what had happened to her.
‘She’ll be just fine.’ Sally King, the counsellor, assured Rose before she led Marnie into the room and closed the door behind her.
* * *
‘Okay, so let’s start from where we left off last week.’ Sally said, getting herself comfortable on the chair opposite her young client. She’d already re-read over her notes from the previous session.
Marnie was suffering with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Sally, who had been informed of the child’s background, could completely understand why.
Her challenge, however, was getting Marnie to reprocess what she had experienced so that she could work through the trauma. Night terrors, anxiety attacks. The classic signs of the body trying to make sense of traumatic events. Marnie’s mind was already fighting to process and heal her past hurts. Sally just needed to help her to recognise all of this. To recognise her triggers. It was a slow process, though. Every time Sally mentioned Marnie’s mother, Josie, or Trevor being murdered, Marnie just clammed up. The memory simply too painful for her to even think about. So Sally had decided to try Marnie with a course of Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing or EMDR, as it was more commonly known. A gentle technique that seemed to be working wonders for Marnie already.
They had begun to make real progress.
‘Okay, are you ready?’
Sitting forward on the chair Marnie nodded. By now, she was used to what the sessions entailed, so she pressed her feet firmly on the floor, her hands relaxed on her thighs as she closed her eyes.
Sally King began the tapping process. Moving her hands up and down as she spoke, alternatively tapping on Marnie’s knees.
‘Okay, Marnie. So we’re going to go back to the time that is most troubling you. Take a deep breath and tell me what you see.’
Marnie closed her eyes. Concentrating really hard she tried to picture that evening that she hadn’t been able to shake from her mind.
Lying in bed, in her bedroom. She was back there.
I’m dreaming. I must be.
That’s what they keep telling me. My mother and my sister.
That none of this is real. That it’s just nightmares again.
‘Where are you?’
‘I’m at home, in my bedroom. I was asleep, but something woke me up. I’m scared. My heart is thumping hard.’
Tap, tap, tap.
‘What are you doing now? What can you see?’
‘I’m waiting for him to come. I can hear him. Walking along the landing. The sound of the handle twisting on my bedroom door.’
‘Are you safe?’ Sally asked softly.
‘No, he’s coming for me.’ Marnie shook her head quickly, her movement firm.
‘Who is coming for you, Marnie?’
‘I thought it was Georgie. She hasn’t come to bed yet. She’s watching TV in the lounge.’
‘Who is there, Marnie, can you tell me?’
Marnie was shaking now. Her small body trembling wildly, involunta
rily, as she recounted what was happening.
‘It’s the Bogeyman,’ Marnie said, crying, big fat tears cascading down her cheek. ‘I’ve been a good girl. I did everything my mummy told me to do. I was good. I don’t know why he’s still come.’
‘Take a big deep breath,’ Sally said gently. ‘You’re safe here with me, Marnie. You are safe. No one can hurt you now.’
Marnie relaxed a little as Sally continued the tapping. Registering the fear on Marnie’s face.
She had turned white with fear. Her eyebrows furrowing. Her eyes moving from left to right repeatedly as she tried to process what was happening to her.
It was hard to see the fear that the child was having to relive, but Sally knew that it was the only way to help her. She had to go through it.
‘What are you doing now?’
‘I’m running.’ Marnie’s voice sounded small, strained. Alien even to her own ears. A slight whisper laced with urgency.
She was there again. In the moment.
‘My legs won’t work, though. They feel like jelly. I’m trying to make them work but they are trembling so much, I can’t make them stop. I’m on Georgie’s bed. I don’t know why. She’s not there. She can’t help me.’
Marnie winced.
Transfixed in the moment, Sally knew she had to try and guide her through.
‘What’s happening now, Marnie?’
Marnie shook her head, as if she was trying to change the image inside her head: make it disappear.
Sally tapped once more.
‘You are safe, Marnie. You are safe. Tell me what’s happening.’
‘I’m holding my breath. I can hear a funny noise. Banging. Then I realise that it’s my heart thumping in my chest. The noise sounds like a drum in my ears.’
‘What can you see?’
‘I can see him.’ Marnie was gulping at the air; gulping down short shallow bursts of air. So engrossed with what she was recalling that she’d forgotten to breathe.
‘Breathe.’ Sally reminded her. ‘Take a slow deep breath. Remember, you are safe here. No one can hurt you now. Tell me where he is?’
Tap, tap, tap.
‘He’s standing in the doorway. He’s watching me. He always does that. Creeps around at night when Mummy is sleeping.’
Marnie paused.
‘I’m trying to hide from him. I’ve pulled the covers up over my head.’
‘Does he find you, Marnie?’
Marnie clenched her fists.
Sally began tapping once more. Bringing the girl’s eye movements back and forth, left and right. She repeated again.
‘You are safe. No one can hurt you. I’m right here with you. You are safe. Does he find you?’
‘Yes, he’s lifted the covers from me. I try to open my mouth but nothing comes out. My voice has disappeared from me.’
‘What’s happening, Marnie? Can you tell me?’
‘He’s got me again. He’s going to hurt me. Do those things to me that I don’t like. He’s going to hurt me.’
‘What are you doing now?’
Marnie paused. Thinking really carefully.
‘I’m hiding.’
Sally tried to visualise the scene. Marnie had said that she was in the bed. That ‘the Bogeyman’ had her. Now she was hiding?
‘Where are you hiding?’
‘I’m not sure. I think I’m hiding inside my body. I’ve made myself go really tiny. If I stay really still he won’t be able to find me. He can only hurt my skin, but he can’t hurt me. I won’t let him.’
‘What happens next?’
‘I can hear Georgie. She’s trying to help me. Trying to get into the room. But he’s locked the door. He won’t let her in. Then there’s a banging sound. Really loud. He looks angry now that he has to stop hurted me.’
‘Tell me what you see?’
‘Georgie and Mummy.’
Sally shifts in her seat. Makes a note in the notebook next to her. Her eyes flicker to the clock again on the wall. They are almost out of time. She should stop. Take Marnie back to her safe place and end the session, but with the progress they are making today, Sally wants Marnie to continue working her way through it all. To make the breakthrough the child so desperately needs.
‘What’s Georgie doing?’
‘They are shouting at him. They know that he hurted me now. They both look angry. Mummy is shouting, but she’s crying too.’
‘Can you tell me what happens next, Marnie? You’re doing such a great job.’
‘He pushes Georgie out of the way. He hurts her. She bangs her head on the wall. She’s lying on the floor. He’s going to hurt my mum too. He’s shouting at her.’
‘Then what happens, Marnie?’
Marnie is quiet now. Contemplating. Deep in thought.
Picturing the scene as if she was right there again.
‘He’s not angry anymore.’
‘Why isn’t he angry. Marnie?’
‘Because he’s dead!’
Marnie stops talking again.
‘Did you see what killed him, Marnie?’
Marnie nods again.
‘It’s a hammer. It’s sticking out of his head. There is a lot of blood. It doesn’t look very nice.’
‘Is your mummy holding the hammer, Marnie?’
Marnie takes a deep breath then. Her eyes moving rapidly behind her eyelids as she recounts the scene.
There is blood everywhere, all up the wall; it’s all over them too.
Splatters of blood streaking up the front of her nightdress; across her mother’s face.
So much blood.
Mummy isn’t holding the hammer. Neither is Georgie.
I am.
I look down at the hammer still gripped tightly in my hand.
All that blood. So much blood.
Mummy takes the hammer. Pulls it from my hand and won’t let it go.
Now Marnie remembers what her mother told her, how she made the two girls promise not to tell.
How she made them both swear.
‘Cross my heart and hope to die. Marnie, say it! You mustn’t tell anyone the truth. You must tell them that I did it. Otherwise, they’ll take you away. Promise me.’
‘Cross my heart, Mummy.’
Marnie opens her eyes.
* * *
Back in the room, Marnie looks straight at Sally, her voice steady, controlled.
‘Yes, my mummy was holding the hammer. She killed him. She killed the Bogeyman.’
Chapter Fifty-Two
Standing at the side of Delray’s grave, Mandy stared down at the raised mound of earth, glad that no flowers had been laid.
Turns out the man wasn’t as popular as he liked to think he was. His funeral was yesterday, but there was no way Mandy would have graced the man’s funeral service with her presence. Not after what he’d tried to do with Georgie. The man was a monster. She couldn’t wish his brutal murder on a more worthy person.
She’d read Javine all wrong. Despite what Josie had always thought of the girl, deep down, Javine had a kind heart. She’d done good, in the end, for all the right reasons. Mandy wished the girl well.
She doubted the police would ever catch up with her. It wasn’t exactly a priority to them, finding someone who had ultimately done them such a huge favour. By killing the man, Javine had pretty much wrapped up the notorious Delray Anderton in a bow and given the man to the Old Bill as a gift. They probably threw themselves a fucking good knees-up to celebrate. Another piece of shit dealt with. Only, this time it was for good.
Feeling the rain start to fall, Mandy pulled her coat tightly around her, before looking down at the grave one last time.
‘Goodbye, Delray,’ she spat. ‘I hope you rot in hell, mate!’
Mandy grinned to herself. She was glad to have done her bit. She’d promised Josie when she’d spoken to her on the phone that she would pay her last respects for the woman.
Though, as Josie had put it, Delray didn’t deserve any respect. She
just wanted Mandy to tell him on her behalf that she hoped he rotted for all eternity.
She was done now.
Turning on her heel, she made her way back towards where Davey was patiently hovering around by the cemetery’s main gates.
The man was a saint.
He had thought she was mad wanting to come here today but, like always, he’d respected her wishes and even insisted on driving her down here.
Walking towards him, Mandy couldn’t help but smile.
She’d finally got her break. They were making a go of it, the two of them, and Mandy was loving every minute of it. Working behind the bar, helping Davey run the pub.
Finally, she’d found her calling.
‘You all right, Mand?’ Davey said as Mandy stepped towards him. Wrapping his arm protectively around her shoulders, he kissed her tentatively on the lips. ‘Come on, it’s freezing out here. Let’s get you home, yeah?’
‘Home.’
Mandy nodded, unable to speak. The emotion caught in her throat. Then she grinned to herself and rolled her eyes.
She was turning into a right old soppy cow!
If only Josie could see her now!
It was still early days for her and Davey but, so far, Mandy had never felt happier.
They’d even spoken about seeing if they could foster the girls.
She still didn’t know all the ins and outs of what had happened that night between Josie and Trevor, but Mandy didn’t care. She knew her friend, and she knew that there was much more to it.
Maybe, one day, Josie would set her straight.
Until then, she’d promised Josie that she’d look out for Georgie and Marnie now. That she’d do everything in her power to make sure they were happy and safe, and it was a promise that Mandy intended to keep.
A letter from Casey
Thank You for taking the time to read The Promise. If you fancy leaving me a review, I’d really appreciate it. Not only is it great to have your feedback, (I love reading each and every one of the reviews left.) but adding a review can really help to gain the attention of new readers too.